Indonesia

Indonesia is a nation consisting of roughly a buttload [over 17,000] of islands off the coast of southeast Asia. It contains about 4% of the people who exist and has more Muslims than anyone else (take that, Nigeria!). Formerly known as the place where the Dutch got all their good drugs, Indonesia achieved independence from the Netherlands in 1945 when the Japanese, who were in a rotten mood and not taking shit from most anybody in those days, showed up and said "Hey guys, could you leave please?"

Hirohito: Passive-aggressive much?

East Timor

East Timor is a southeast Asian nation located on the eastern half of the island of Timor. There isn't a country called West Timor. See, there once was a time when Indonesia basically decided it wanted everything between Malaysia and Australia, and they pretty much pulled it off too, but these guys, these guys on the eastern half of the island of Timor, when people came calling and went "Hey, you guys wanna be Indonesia?", these people were like "No. We don't wanna be Indonesia." And I think that's kind of a nice sentiment, you know? Of course, that was never really okay with Indonesia, and they have been really passive-aggressive about it ever since.

"No, huh? Oh, yeah, it's TOTALLY fine. Like, yeah, whatever you wanna do is okay. I mean, we didn't really want your half of the island anyway. Yeah, I mean all we REALLY wanted was West Timor, but we just thought we'd ask, you know? Because like, we thought maybe you'd get jealous if West Timor got to be Indonesia and nobody invited you, you know? But hey, you wanna be independent. Yeah, that's fine. Totally cool.

...You fucks."