Italy

Italy is a country in southern Europe that would probably be okay if not for the fact that it is almost completely full of Italians. The capital is Rome, center of an ancient civilization that, at one point, stretched all the way into the British isles (mainly just so Roman officers would have a place to send soldiers they really didn't like). The ancient Romans basically invented stealing ideas from other cultures, making them lamer and then taking credit for them; in many ways, Roman mythology can be seen as an ancient precursor to Taco Bell. Florence, Italy was home to the Renaissance, a cultural movement that spanned the 14th to 17th centuries and extended all across Europe, providing us with some sweet-ass paintings and a bunch of sculptures of naked dudes with terrific muscles and tiny penises. One of the most famous Renaissance artists was Leonardo Da Vinci, who was the first to conceptualize a helicopter and a bunch of other awesome scientific shit, but is best remembered for this stupid painting of a woman who's kind of smiling, but not really. Over the past century, Italy has made a number of innovations in doing a terrible job of running a country, providing the world with such great steps backward as fascism and Silvio Berlusconi.

Seriously guys, she's not even that hot.