Croatia

An eastern European country located on the Adriatic coast, Croatia has beautiful women, miles of gorgeous coastline and a language that both looks and sounds like word vomit. Croatia is currently being considered for EU membership, but major obstacles exist in the form of Belgium, Sweden and the United Kingdom, all of whom are afraid of how woefully uncool they're likely to look in comparison. On a map, Croatia's unique shape and location gives the appearance that it's making the statement "Bosnia and Herzegovina is greater than Slovenia" (...debatable), but at the end of the day, there's at least one thing that all of those Balkan states can agree on, and that's fuck Turkey, am I right?

Yes. Yes I am.

Nothing personal, Slovenia.